The Hypocritic Oath

Posted on September 19th, 2005

Back when I started working in advertising, I swore that I would only write ads for products that I had personally experienced and endorsed. Which also meant no guns, cigarettes, ads targeted at kids under seven or – had I stopped to consider the ramifications – vegetables. Don't tell my three year-old, but I fucking hate vegetables. It's a wonder I can have bowel movements at all.

That oath lasted about as long as it took you to read it.

As the comic suggests, my fall from grace was occasioned by a particularly throat-lacerating razor. But, like fundamentalists who've read a bit too much Darwin for their own good, I think most of us in the business still want to believe. It's not necessarily in the job description – technically speaking, it's enough that we make believers out of other people – but nobody wants to be selling snake oil when they could be championing something they truly feel to be the greatest product in the history of humanity

-Graham

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